Children should be equipped with mute buttons.

Desperate for a couple new shirts for our vacation I loaded up the kids and the double stroller and headed to the mall.  I grab the few summer type shirts that they are still selling and tried to maneuver my stroller into a dressing room with the kids.  There I am in a small room standing in front of a mirror the size of the room trying on different shirts while my two children watched.
I tried on the first shirt that was cut just a little too low for my liking.  My pancake cleavage was just not looking hot.  We moved right along to the next one and it wasn't any prettier and much more revealing than the first.  Trying to whisper but not succeeding my daughter says, Mommy I can see your boobies.  I gave her the look and told her to be quiet and moved on to the next shirt while hearing a few giggles from my dressing room neighbors.  Next I put on one that was just not right, not right at all.  My boobs hung out with one going east while the other went south, my rolls were looking for an escape route and it was just plain wrong all over.
Mommy if you wear that Mickey is going to be very mad at you.
Daughter be quiet, I told her as I heard snickers within the room.
But Mommy, Mickey Mouse will be mad if he sees your boobies.
And with that I got dressed and left the dressing room without making eye contact as the girl, trying to hold back her giggles, took the shirts and my pride with her.